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Three Clowns Travel Abroad

Three Clowns Travel Abroad

Author: Smt_Radha_Rajan <radharajan7@hotmail.com>
Publication: Hindu Vivek Kendra

Introduction: Joint Secretary, VIGIL, A Public Opinion Forum, Chennai

We hear that three clowns traveled abroad to Pakistan a few weeks ago to stage a comedy to entertain the self anointed President of Pakistan and his faithful.

We also hear that the Great Dictator was so impressed with their performance that he is still laughing and has promised to recommend their names for the Nobel Peace Prize.

'Vigil' thinks they deserve it too in keeping with the tradition of awarding the Nobel Peace Prize to those who have waged wars in their respective areas and countries of work.

Musharraf is also reported to have thanked them over dinner for their enlivening comic performances and has invited them into Pakistan without a visa anytime they wished. Which suited our footloose "mobile independent republic" just fine considering she doesn't believe in nations and national borders although she doesn't squirm much every time she is forced to touch her Indian passport when she has to travel abroad to perform her one-woman comedy act or to collect some foreign moolah.

What they said:

Pooh Ram, The clown with the little brain:

This clown's brain shrinks by a milli meter every time he suffers mental indigestion leading to a verbal purge.

'India should not have taken advantage of the 1971 situation. Similarly, you can't threaten war under the cover of December 13. "Our present government is a party of national chauvinism which represents a danger to India domestically and in the neighbourhood'.

Pinocchio Shekhar, The clown with the growing nose :

This clown's nose grows by an inch every time he uses pretentious words that no one understands. He can keep his nose in check only when he uses words of one syllable.

"India is an imperfect democracy and Pakistan is an imperfect dictatorship. India has not been able to achieve the level of prosperity a genuine democracy would have acquired. Similarly, Pakistan has not sunk into the depth of chaos a genuine dictatorship would have got a country into".

(The Butcher Of Kargil was so flummoxed by this verbosity that he has assured this clown that the next time he visited Pakistan, he would find that it was indeed a perfect dictatorship and a genuine dictatorship. The wannabe Perfect Dictator has appointed Shekhar the Clown, the official Pakistani Court Jester)

Carry Arundhati, The Footloose Clown with the hatchet:

This clown buys herself a new hatchet every time some one offends her sense of self-righteousness. The last time she used the hatchet she was thrown into the Tihar jail by the Supreme Court for using real hatchets in her comic shows.

Two years ago in Chennai, this clown had declared herself to be a "mobile independent republic" where she used the hatchet against Pokharan II.

I have that hatchet with me still as a momento of the best comic lines I had heard in a long time.

In Pakistan she had declared: "If I had had prior information that India was going to send nuclear missiles into Pakistan, I would be here in Pakistan to receive them".

Pakistan's national English daily reports that the Great Dictator was not amused by this hilarious one-liner and has told the hatchet wielding clown not to announce to the world, and definitely not to announce to India, the next time that she intends to visit Pakistan.

Saddened by the decreasing numbers among the audience in their comic shows in India, and encouraged by the Pakistani audience rolling on the floor, clutching their stomachs, as the ultimate gesture of appreciation for their comedy act, the trio has decided to visit Pakistan every third month.

The last that was seen of them, we hear they are busy recording thunderous applause to play it safe the next time they visit Pakistan. Next stop, USA.

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