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Its been over two weeks since I landed in Bombay I'm so happy at my
decision to come. I travelled by bus, by train, by air, in Bombay,
to Calcutta and back. And now I go back, touch wood, with not even
one negative or hostile experience. Its been quite a trip....
It was my first day with John Crasto from your office on the
intra-city (suburban) rail. It was the eye-opener for me.
Throughout the journey, John kept asking me about various aspects
of life in Pakistan, Pakistan mein yeh kaisa hai, woh kaisa hai?
(How is this or that like in Pakistan?).
We were in the general, second class compartment and, frankly, I
was quite nervous by his questions to me, so openly, in public.
"Mai ne socha ki koi to chura nikaal ke khada ho jayega" ("I
thought that someone would pull out a knife and attack me"). But it
was not that way at all. Everyone was so curious, warm and
hospitable.
I was trying to compare life in Bombay with Islamabad which is
relatively so slow compared to Bombay. My fellow travellers
responded with, 'Don't you enjoy that? Why must you always be in a
hurry? It must be so lovely to live in Islamabad, to wait
peacefully, for your auto to come by ...."
There was almost a sense of envy of such a laid-back lifestyle.
No raised eyebrows at the fact that I was a Pakistani. I somehow
expected that there may be a negative reaction specially in a
crowded train where someone may turn hostile. But, on the
contrary, I was treated like royalty, people constantly getting up
to give me a seat and so on.
Next came my trip to Calcutta, by the Howrah Mail. Next to me in
the compartment were two Marwari businessmen with huge tilaks on
their foreheads. Throughout the journey, they were digging into
their bags, pulling out all kinds of home-made goodies, feeding me
continuously: "Hamaari bhabhi ne yeh banaya hai, aap yeh kha ke
dekhiye" ("My sister-in-law has made this, you must try these").
I couldn't believe this was happening to me in India. You know the
negative press they get, the Marwaris. That they are such a
close-knit community, extremely religious etc. But they had no
problems sharing their plate and their food with me .
Everyone in the train compartment knew right from the start ' that
here I was, a Pakistani. But all I got was genuine warmth and
hospitality. All I had to do was answer many curious questions
about Pakistanis and their lifestyle.
You know, thanks to Zee TV and Star TV, Pakistanis to a certain
extent, have been exposed to the lifestyle of Indians but Indians
still don't know much about life in Pakistan. A Bombay teenager did
not even know that the capital of Pakistan is Islamabad. There is
so little knowledge of each other's geography and cultures. I come
from the Frontier (near Afghanistan) and I have to keep explaining
to people in India where that is.
Then there was this other group I met in Calcutta that had this
really weird image of Pakistani women. Do they think that we are
all burkha-clad and stifled?
But on the other hand, all the warmth and concern. In Calcutta,
while shopping, I was asked about life and conditions in Pakistan,
"Wahan khairiyat se hai na?" ("Are things alright there?). Maybe
this arose out of an impression that we live in a constant state of
peril, maybe at some level people cannot imagine us really being
happy in Pakistan (!!) but overriding all this was openness and
genuine warmth.
I participated in the wildest Holi party in Calcutta where there
were these bunch of kids who were meeting a Pakistani for the first
time in their lives and were thrilled at the prospect. I am taking
back a "pink ear" especially for my mother to see!
I stopped by in Bombay on the way back from Sri Lanka because I
wanted to spend time with you and find out about your work. But as
I moved on the streets, by bus and train, walked on the beach, I
found myself telling people at the outset of any conversation that
I was a Pakistani.
Maybe, I was unconsciously testing people's responses. I had
frankly anticipated all kinds of incredulous, angry, venomous
responses, so I was truly surprised when these did not come.
I feel after coming here that every Pakistani must visit India to
be able to fathom the psychological make up of Indians. Everything
here is on such a massive scale. India, then Bombay! One experience
on the suburban rail, the sheer numbers who travel up and down,
and, maybe, we Pakistanis will then be able to understand why India
is always playing big brother .. simply because India is so big.
When I visited the Indian National Museum in Calcutta, and saw for
myself, that so many states, regions, peoples, make up India so
many different clothes, food, lifestyles-the real diversity of
India dame home to me.
There's nothing comparable in Pakistan. Maybe that's why India is
what it is and Indian perceptions as we see them are what they
are...
When I decided to stop by India for a fortnight's holiday,
everyone, my family and friends despite knowing me, were
incredulous. They said, "You are going to come back like this!"
(she gestures showing a tilak on her forehead).
This was said in jest, but the fact was that they couldn't believe
that I would chose to come to India for my vacation.
So, when I go back all in one piece, I think I would have done more
than my bit towards changing Pakistani perceptions. Imagine living
in India for a month and returning in one piece! Sleeping with the
enemy, literally, and returning home, none the worse for it!
(As told to Communalism Combat)
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