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Men smart, women smarter - The Telegraph

Sudipta Bhattacharjee ()
11 May 1997

Title : Men smart, women smarter
Author : Sudipta Bhattacharjee
Publication : The Telegraph
Date : May 11, 1997

One would have thought that the passing of the Khasi Lineage Bill, codifying the
prevailing Khasi matriliny for the first time, would be a welcome move. But the
mood in Meghalaya, ever since the Khasi Hills Autonomous District Council (KHADC)
passed the legislation, has been as gloomy and thunderous as its environs on a
particularly deplorable monsoon day.

The matrilineal society followed by the Khasi tribals is unique for sundry
reasons. It vests the rights of lineage and inheritance in its women, primarily
in the Youngest daughter of the house, who is known as khatduh. She is not only
the custodian of the ancestral property, but is responsible for looking after her
parents and other old and infirm members of her clan. Performing the last rites of
the aged folk are her also duty.

But today, Khasi men hate the idea of Women continuing to have the upper hand in
their society. Organisations like the Syngkhong Rympei Thummai (SRT) which quite
literally means Restructure of Khasi Society, and powerful students' bodies are
exuding venom over the Bill as it seeks to legalise matriliny. "The Bill is an
attempt to tie down the khasis to the primitive, unworkable and irrelevant
matrilineal system," they say.

Their ire is directed primarily against the youngest daughter, as "the modern
khatduh takes all the ancestral property and neglects her traditional role as the
custodian of the same." In a memorandum to the Governor last month, the SRT
alleged that the khatduh "is easily influenced by any, Tom, Dick or Harry who
happens to be her spouse."

One of the major grievances of the menfolk is that the women, given their
independence and zeal, often look beyond their fold to marry men of their own
stature, many of whom are non-tribals. But, given their tradition, the children
get the mother's clan name and enjoy the privileges of a Scheduled Tribe under the
Constitution. Besides, some of the non-tribal husbands conduct business in the
khasi wives' names.

The detractors of the Bill, while seeking property rights for the men, if not a
reversal to patriliny, have pointed out that "many of the clauses in the Bill
presumed an ideal situation in which the women still played their traditional
roles perfectly." Not content with that, it falls back on the chiched view that
"the females who are constitutionally weak should limit themselves to domestic and
motherly kind of work."

The khasi women bristle at this. "Look around and you will find the women working
in offices, running businesses or as successful professionals. But they keep the
home fires burning too. We have excelled in our fields, despite our being
overburdened with excess power simply because our traditions have ensured our
dignity and independence," says a Khasi school principal. "Can you imagine this
kind of output from women in a patriarchal set up?" She asks.

But most Khasi women feel the men should be given some property. With white
collar jobs reaching saturation point, land is the only thing they can fall back
on. "The parents must treat their sons and daughters equally, this will help
remove the resentment," says Roshan Warjri, Meghalaya's lone women politician.

As for the demand for a change to patriliny, she counters: "Our forefathers were
no fools. When they gave their sanction to a system, they obviously saw the merit
in it. It is a question of our bloodline; we cannot make a joke of it."

Indeed, the Khasi bloodline, which stoutly follows the kur-kha diktat, forbids
intra-clan relationships. Marriage among members of the same clan is taboo, and
those violating it are promptly ex-communicated. A lady entrepreneur, Lakyntiew
Lyngdoh, says it will be difficult to check intra-clan marriages once any change
in matriliny is initiated.

Another bone of contention is the issue of adultery. "A man can be charged with
adultery, but it is difficult to establish the same for a woman in a matrilineal
society," says one angry, young man. "What are we, breeding bulls? We can't help
feeling inadequate, fathering kids who don't even get my name, live with my in
laws and have to go by the decisions of my brother-in-law." For the maternal uncle
is the head of the family, as per khasi tradition and has a duty towards the
upbringing of the nieces and nephews.

The social organisations of Seng Khasi and Sein Ray have, however, extended their
support to the Bill. The elders say they have nothing against the old practice of
their sisters and daughters having custodial rights of family property. But among
the young, sibling rivalry is assuming ugly proportions; often the old mother
becomes the pawn in this game of greed.

"To pre-empt such friction," reasons a Khasi lady doctor, "perhaps every mother
should, in her lifetime mark out property for all the children. My mother has
given a plot of land to my brother, as there is no bar to men getting ancestral
property."


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