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Blessed are the Benny Hinnites

Blessed are the Benny Hinnites

Author: N.S. Rajaram

The hoped for blessings have to come not from God or Jesus but Delhi.

The suspense is over, finally. In a garish display of lights  and sound to rival any WWF extravaganza, the miracle worker Benny Hinny  (his correct name among several known), his plump well-oiled face  beaming across TV screens in Bangalore, stepped on the make-shift stage  at the Jakkur Airport generously gifted to him by the Congress led  Karnataka Government. The rest, as they say is history.

The crowd was not what it was promised to be- not a tenth in  fact. A few years back, the pop musician Yanni drew a bigger crowd than  this pop godman, even while charging exorbitant entry fees. But what  Benny Hinny lacked in numbers, he made up in the importance of the  guests- or at least their self-importance. At the lead was the Karnataka  CM Dharam Singh, looking like a WWF performer- not quite wrestling fit,  for making him look athletic was seemingly beyond the miracles of Benny  Hinny.

Then there was Oscar Fernandes, the aspiring Kathak dancer,  looking out of place in the glaring lights and the blaring music- like  any dancer would in a WWF wrestling ring. There was also Ajit Jogi who  looks out of place everywhere. These worthies were vying, it seemed, for  blessings not from any god in heaven but the goddess in New Delhi's 10  Janpath.

Some critics complained about Government sponsorship of this  pop religious show, especially since the Jakkur Airport is a defence  facility that now lies in ruins. But secularism is a higher cause than  national security. At Benny Hinny's next extravaganza, which is rumored  to be a fireworks display, the Government should place the country's  nuclear arsenal at his disposal. May the whole country be blessed by the  fallout!

The issue is not only secularism, but also the cultivation  of the scientific spirit, which too the Constitution enjoins. The  Government should sponsor the Benny Hinnies of the world to educate us  heathens with their scientific miracles- just as it now sponsors Haj  pilgrims to follow such scientific rituals as "Stoning the Devil."

What if political leaders appear meek and submissive, open  to ridicule before the world? Since when did the Indian politician ever  act in way that upholds dignity and national respect? That will take a  true miracle- one that a Benny Hinny will never perform even if he can,  for he surely knows that it will put him and his ilk out of business.

In the meantime, the meek shall inherit not just the earth,  but the blessed name. Henceforth, thou shalt be known as Benny Hinnite.

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